View Full Version : LPW Presents: ALTERED REALITY 8! Live from San Francisco TRASH TALK THREAD!

Macho Mourn
07-29-2018, 09:45 PM
Breaking up or breaking through,
Breaking something's all we ever do,
Shoot straight, travel far,
Stone crazy's all we ever are,

But I don't care for lies,
And I won't tell you twice,
Because when all else fails,
Dead Men Tell No Tales...

07-29-2018, 10:47 PM
Sixx: I guess it’s a good thing that I meant it when I said I could beat those two clowns at once.

07-29-2018, 11:53 PM
It's 2018, and I'm facing a dude who calls himself the "Harvester of Sorrow".

It's a great song, I'll give you that Phantom L... Oh dear.

Well, time to chew you up, Spit Out the Bone, and move on to the next one.

The X
07-30-2018, 08:20 AM
No Altered Reality graphic? Where's De or Robb when you need 'em...

No multi-man matches? A new day for LPW I see.

07-30-2018, 11:04 AM
Austin: I wish I had something really cool or cryptic to say... but I don't. So I'll just tell the truth.

I'm going to fuck some champions up.

Mr. Maverick
07-30-2018, 11:17 AM
Maverick: I'm not on the card? Oh well my losing streak continues. Carry on chaps. See you next cycle unless your the hardcore champion who barely shows his fucking face these days.

Someone get this Joe Citizen chap a death certificate in case shit goes sideways.

Phantom Lord
07-31-2018, 12:08 AM
It's 2018, and I'm facing a dude who calls himself the "Harvester of Sorrow".

It's a great song, I'll give you that Phantom L... Oh dear.

Well, time to chew you up, Spit Out the Bone, and move on to the next one.

Spit Out The Bone is a great song. But have you ever sat back and actually listened to what the words are saying?

Come unto me and you will feel perfection
Come unto me and dedicate
Come unto me, you’ll never feel rejection
Come unto me and terminate

Sean, I am here to offer a new way. I am here to dominate and terminate those who stand in that way. You will be the first to experience this new way. Come with me and you'll feel perfection.

Don't come with me, and you'll be dominated.

Caeser Osiris
07-31-2018, 10:23 PM
Osiris: There are dozens of "tropes" I could say here; like, "The more things change, the more they stay the same" or even "I'm going to Alter YOUR Reality"

But all that I really need to say is that this whole tournament is a bit of a joke. I'm in a tournament with Bobino, Reece, and Ozzy; and if that isn't the biggest telegraphed tournament final in history, then I don't know what is. Bobino's going to go through Reece, I'm going to go through Ozzy, and then the match actually begins. This might as well not even be a four man match. The only ones who really matter are the ones who started it all.

Since a couple months ago, when he cheated to get ahead, this has only been about Bobino and I. At Altered Reality I'm going to embarrass Ozzy, Bobino might let Reece live, and at the end of the night it's going to be me, standing tall over "Big Bad" Bob, The Western States Heritage Champion.

08-03-2018, 08:58 AM
You still work here? That’s cool. You’ve got a killer gimmick, dude.

Caeser Osiris
08-05-2018, 04:19 AM
Osiris: Only thing I'm killing is careers, old man. Once I finish up with Bob, I'll be more than happy to show you.

The Dude
08-05-2018, 11:47 PM
Looks like I've got the night off. More time to drink beer then I guess.

Keep that Hardcore title warm for me guys, 'cause it's gonna be mine.

08-09-2018, 01:23 PM
(Ozzy limps into the frame)

Ozzy: Fuck! Sorry I'm late, I had a thing. I'm sure you can read about it in the... everywhere. Anyway, Caesar, I'm glad to see that you're underestimating me. That's been paying off for me lately.

Silver Kazama
08-11-2018, 09:12 PM
Silver Kazama: Good luck to Bronx and Thornridge. Let's see if Sixx and I can get through this without killing each other...

Caeser Osiris
08-12-2018, 12:07 PM
You still work here? That’s cool. You’ve got a killer gimmick, dude.

Osiris: Killer promo...dude

Silver Kazama
08-12-2018, 12:41 PM
Kazama scoffs loudly.

08-14-2018, 05:40 AM
Thornridge: Cheers for the luck Mr Kazama. But I do feel sorry for you. For the longest time we've been preparing for the fight of our lives, but Storme is suddenly missing...

So you'll have to excuse us if we go a little bit overboard, but we've got to do what we've got to do. Oh, and if Sixx hasn't shared some critical info with you, wear a cup. Kay?

Macho Mourn
08-14-2018, 12:20 PM
Mourn: The words of such an honest, wholesome, man.

08-14-2018, 10:07 PM
Thornridge: Honest, yes.

Wholesome, doubt it.

Nice chat Despana, it's been brief as always.

Macho Mourn
08-18-2018, 01:53 PM
Mourn: I see you conveniently left out "man."

08-18-2018, 07:22 PM
Thornridge sighs and claps slowly before turning around to face Mourn with a look of defeat.

Thornridge: Fuck, since when do you even talk to people anymore? In any case, it only took three years for people to figure it out. Damn, I just thought I just had more time...

Thornridge took in a deep breath, straightening out his suit before speaking up.

Thornridge: EVERYONE! Everyone? I have a revelation to make due to Mourn's annoyingly keen ear. I'm not actually a 'man'. I'm actually a tri-gendered nine tailed Pyrodingo who prefers to be known as a cis-white male. I also have resting 'Russian Spy' face, although I'm clearly not Russian, and have been taking therapy to take control my stress eating as well. Oh! I have a tendency to snap in times of rage, wanting to slash and gore pretty little faces with the pointy bits of my barbed wire cricket bat for the sake of entertaining fans and myself.

You see, I take my flaws and wear them as a badge for the world to clearly see, like my World Heavyweight Tag Team Championship of the world. I'm an open book because, to quote Jean Luc Picard of the starship Enterprise, a lie of omission is still a lie. Let's read page one, shall we?

Thornridge catches a book thrown his way, pulling out reading glasses from his pocket before turning to the first page. He looked up at Mourn before speaking.

Thornridge: Now, I give you a simple choice. Would you like me to read it to you and have you know what it means to be lulled to slumber? Or would you like to go and prepare for the biggest match of your career? Dickhead.

Macho Mourn
08-18-2018, 07:43 PM
Mourn: it is a damn shame you use that much vitriol towards me.

But, since we are together, have you ever understood what brotherhood was, what family should be? If you did, you would have never taken the path you did. Someday, maybe in the future, you will thank me. I showed you that when you fight for the pride of a loved one, there are no rules. I got my flesh in the end. On all parties. Even after my brotherhood stopped me from justice. I wish it did not go this route, but you tied my hands. And sadly, for you, I love my wife far more than I ever cared for you.

Now, as far as being prepared for AR. I would not have showed up at the stadium if I was not prepared.

08-18-2018, 08:07 PM
Thornridge: Being family is being upfront and honest with each other, something I know I did and I never question that. Brotherhood is being able to discuss matters and understand differences in opinion. This? This was family, this was brotherhood until you shut me off. We both know where it lead to, a brutal and violent ass kicking to my person with your wife watching, participating, from ringside.

Did I deserve it? In your eyes, yes, obviously. In my eyes, no, obviously. I've already told you why I held you back from attacking Golden but it seemed you abandoned family and brotherhood way before I did to really actually care about reason.

But... you did give me an idea for our next meeting. It involves rope, a barbed wire cricket bat, and your wife watching, participating. Maybe then you'll understand what having 'your arms tied behind your back' really means. Would you like to know more?

Macho Mourn
08-18-2018, 08:23 PM
When Kassandra's hand slaps against Mourn's chest, he shoots his eyes at her. She shakes her head at him. Mourn shoves the arm away and stands anyways. He fixes his cuffs as he stars at Thorny.

Mourn: I hope you never find love. For the other person's sake. Because if they ever heard about this conversation, they would side with a man like me. Threatening my wife? She never touched you. Not once. And you attack her? This is the new Thornridge?

Bronx, get away from this man. He is going to get you killed.

Calm down, lose your title, and learn something about reality. But for now, you are no longer worth my time. I want to be in the main event. Not a cell.


Kassandra stands as Mourn storms out of the room. She spends a moment staring at Thorny. She shakes her head, and leaves.

08-18-2018, 08:28 PM
Thornridge chuckled to himself as he turned his back on the departing couple, going to through his gear bag.

Thornridge: I never said I was wholesome. At least I'm 'man' enough to be honest about it...