View Full Version : September 2018 Columnist of the Month- Mizfan Wins!!

Prime Time
10-14-2018, 11:16 AM
Good afternoon, everyone. I know that Steve has been really busy in the last week or so (even busier than the ‘really busy’ he’d been in the several months before that) so I thought I’d get us started with the Column of the Month for September.

Before we get to the list, here’s a refresher on the rules.


The winner of the Columnist of the Month contest will receive the prize of having one column posted on the main page of LordsOfPain.net

1) The winner of Columnist of the Month is determined by which of the eligible columnists receives the largest amount of votes within the allotted voting period.

2). No voting for yourself.

3). You must vote for Columnist of the Month to be eligible to win. Should the person with the most votes not place a vote during the allotted timeframe, said person will be disqualified and the first runner up in terms of number of votes gained will be named the winner. One need not place a vote to be awarded single Column of the Month.

4). A columnist must have posted at least one column during the allotted time period in order to be eligible. Duh.

5). When voting, please name both the columnist and, if applicable, the title of their ongoing series in a bold and easily determined fashion. Makes it easier on us old mod folk to more clearly discern the votes, what with our cataracts and such.

6). Main page writers are ineligible to win either the Columnist or Column awards. The exception to this is if they were not called up until the next month. For instance, a writer who wrote stuff in April and was called up on May 3rd would still be eligible to win the April Columnist contest. The prize would just be a bit pointless, I guess. The reason that main page writers are ineligible to win the single Column award is simply because they could, and often do, post said column simultaneously on the main page. This is a CF award, so only CF writers are considered.

7). Please refrain from editing your vote once it is placed, so as to not fuck up the tally. Some circumstances, such as a noob vote for a main pager, are the only loopholes to this one and will be pointed out and handled by a moderator.

8). If a candidate is caught campaigning for CotM, either publicly or privately via PM or social media, they will be disqualified and quite possibly banned. Do your selling through your writing. Begging is lame.

9). Columns about columns (such as the State of the CF or End of Year CF Awards) are not eligible for COTM consideration and will not be counted in favor of their respective authors in the final tally for the month.

10). As it pertains to collaborations, there are a few variations that require clarification.

a) If it's a "tag team" style "traditional" collaboration (i.e.: ETA or The Power Trip or The Mega Column) then both members of the team must vote in order to claim victory as a team.

b) If a single columnist gathers a group of individuals for a "roundtable" collab, only the organizer of said series must vote in order to claim victory. For instance, if Jimmy McColumnGuyDuderson wants to break down the greatest jobbers of all time and asks two of his pals to help out, only Jimmy needs to vote in order to win the award should he garner enough votes since he is the blatant driving force, as opposed to the give and take equality of a "tag team" collab.

For the voters, if you wish to specifically vote for a "traditional" collab team, name both writers. If you wish to honor a "roundtable" collab, just name the organizer of said collab.

11) You cannot vote for a former main page writer until said writer is at least 4 months removed from their main page stint at the time of the voting period. For instance, if Writer McGee just left his main page spot in January and resumed writing in the CF, he is not eligible to win CotM until the May contest. This rule is included simply because it's kind of stupid to award a main page column to a writer who just gave up a gig in which the point was to post columns on the main page. If they wanted to be on the main page then they probably would've, you know, stayed on the main page. We get that the CF has a certain allure, what with the sense of community and ability to win awards from one's peers and all that, but let us not forget the reason why the CF exists in the first place. It's not to placate egos by handing out peer determined awards, it's to find writers for the Lords of Pain main page. If you've had that spot and chose to leave it, perhaps it's time that someone else got the opportunity to prove why they deserve a shot. This rule is only applicable to the COLUMNIST vote, not the single COLUMN vote.

12). In the event of a tie, regardless the number of people involved, the deadlock be broken by means of a re-vote with the tied parties as the only available candidates. Said re-vote will be three days long. If we still have a tie after that, fuck it, we've got two winners.

Don't forget to cast a vote for the Column of the Month gimmick as well. Just name which single column you felt was the best of the month. The actual Column of the Month. Just one. NOT AN ENTIRE SERIES. This will help make the process of voting for Column of the Year when it comes time for the Year End Awards that much easier, as well as give some well deserved props to someone who straight up knocked one out of the park in a given month.

Here's the list that I've put together as best I can. Apologies if I've left anything off.

Inside The Mind: Storytime 21

Benjamin Button
7 prayers for Lucha Underground

Don Franc
The New Event #1 - To Shed Oneself
The New Event #2 - Will An All-Women WWE TV Show Work?

Bull From A Bulldog: The Senior Tour

Kingzak Presents: The Unspoken history of the Internet Championship II
Kingzak presents: Hell in a Cell 2018 Predictions

The Life & Times of Bobby Heenan: Rude and Premature (July '90)
The Life & Times of Bobby Heenan: The Perfect Storm (August '90)
The Life & Times of Bobby Heenan: Big Boss Mama (September '90)
The Life & Times of Bobby Heenan: Rude No More (October '90)
The Life & Times of Bobby Heenan: Serving Hard Time (November ’90)
The Life & Times of Bobby Heenan: Perfection Doubled (December ’90)

Prime Time
Take Up Thy Wrestling Boots and Walk - The Power of Hate
Prime Time on Wrestling XIX - The Morality of Wrestling
Prime Time Warp - Spartacus

Skulduggery w/Friends
Half Luck, Half Skul: August Madness - The Greatest SummerSlam Match (Final)

MY WORLD: 12 Things The Rock Taught Me About How to Behave in Business

With that out of the way you may start voting…… now!

Voting ends on Saturday, October 20th at 11:59 PM (CST) / 9:59 PM (PST) / Whatever o'clock :59 (other weird time zones)

Don Franc
10-14-2018, 04:46 PM
Columnist - Mizfan
Column - Prime Time: Morality of Wrestling

10-14-2018, 05:19 PM
Columnist: Kingzak

Column: Don Franc The New Event #1 - To Shed Oneself

10-14-2018, 05:29 PM
Columnist: Skullduggery
The guy puts so much effort into his collaborations that are super interesting to read and be a part of. He finished his most recent one off in September, this is more a culmination of all that effort for the Summer Slam series but hey, I can vote for who I want.

Column: Inside The Mind 21
Just like last year Nony has swung in out of nowhere and produced something that’ll probably win COTY

10-15-2018, 06:05 AM
Columnist: Prime Time

Column: Don's To Shed Oneself

10-15-2018, 04:22 PM
Gonna have to say Mizfan here,

10-16-2018, 01:52 PM
Thanks for jumping on this, Pete.

I think Prime Time really deserves the vote here. He put out three radically different and radically awesome columns and ought to be recognized for it.

Some really good choices individually but I think I'll have to go with Storytime from 'nony, just a super fun column.

10-16-2018, 04:33 PM
Thank you, Pete. I'm currently having to visit my mom just to have internet. And do laundry. And do my girlfriend's laundry.

Hard times, baby.

As always, get your vote on, people.

Benjamin Button
10-17-2018, 02:41 AM
Mizfan for columnist...another big Bobby the Brain month.

Big Bossman mama for column

10-17-2018, 07:51 AM
Columnist: Prime Time
Column: Take Up Thy Wrestling Boots and Walk - The Power of Hate by Prime Time

10-21-2018, 01:31 AM
Looks like we got another tie

Prime Time
10-21-2018, 05:38 AM
Not quite. I didn't vote yet, so would be ineligible to win. But rather than have the messy ending I'm going to count my vote a few hours late because I thought I did it days ago. I feel like everyone would prefer a clean win with a bit of good sense over being a stickler for the rules and counting it as a technicality.

Either way the result is the same. Mizfan adds back to back COTM wins to his CV, and for those keeping score at home, moves to #13 over all.

We do have a tie in the single column category, though I don't think that requires a run-off. So congratulations to both Don Franc and Anonymous.

Don Franc
10-21-2018, 04:38 PM
Congrats to Mizfan who deserved this win based off the quality of his Heenan series. The big 13, that's huge. Mizfans is definitely leaving everyone in the dust.

Also, congrats to Anoymous. Fantastic column written this month. And I don't doubt he will be getting more votes the next time he decides to pop in.

10-22-2018, 07:07 AM
Congrats to Miz. It is definitely deserved. I will say though Zak voted a few hours late last month before anyone closed voting officially and it didnt count. We can't really pick and choose when it counts or not.

Prime Time
10-22-2018, 07:12 AM
It doesn't make a difference though. I'm either disqualified and he wins, or I cast my vote and he wins. Take your pick, because it literally only counts in how it gets recorded. In a case where it makes some material difference I'd agree with you, but in a case like this it makes no difference to the end result whatsoever.

Anyway, to come to what's important. Congratulations to Mizfan. Well deserved.

10-22-2018, 02:36 PM
Really touched to win this again, thanks for all the votes and kind words towards the Heenan series. Not gonna keep cranking them out at this level for a while so might sit at 13 for quite a long time, somebody come catch me!

And congrats to Nony and Don, great voices here in the CF!