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  1. #1
    The Brain
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    Columnist of the Month Contest - September 2019 - #7 for Benjamin Button!

    Greetings, CF! October is upon us, so it's time to look back at the month that was September. I'm a bit sad our really strong turnout from August has gone down a bit, but there's a ton of quality stuff to vote on so I'm not too worried about it in the end. But you're not really reading this anyway, so let's get right to it!

    If you’re new here or have never bothered to look over them before, the full rules are below – check them out first. If not, skip down, and you can find the list of eligible columns for the month. The basic gist, as you’re probably aware, is that you vote for the person you thought had the best month for columnist, and the best individual piece for column.

    RULES


    The winner of the Columnist of the Month contest will receive the prize of having one column posted on the main page of LordsOfPain.net

    1) The winner of Columnist of the Month is determined by which of the eligible columnists receives the largest amount of votes within the allotted voting period.

    2). No voting for yourself.

    3). You must vote for Columnist of the Month to be eligible to win. Should the person with the most votes not place a vote during the allotted timeframe, said person will be disqualified and the first runner up in terms of number of votes gained will be named the winner. One need not place a vote to be awarded single Column of the Month.

    4). A columnist must have posted at least one column during the allotted time period in order to be eligible. Duh.

    5). When voting, please name both the columnist and, if applicable, the title of their ongoing series in a bold and easily determined fashion. Makes it easier on us old mod folk to more clearly discern the votes, what with our cataracts and such.

    6). Main page writers are ineligible to win either the Columnist or Column awards. The exception to this is if they were not called up until the next month. For instance, a writer who wrote stuff in April and was called up on May 3rd would still be eligible to win the April Columnist contest. The prize would just be a bit pointless, I guess. The reason that main page writers are ineligible to win the single Column award is simply because they could, and often do, post said column simultaneously on the main page. This is a CF award, so only CF writers are considered.

    7). Please refrain from editing your vote once it is placed, so as to not fuck up the tally. Some circumstances, such as a noob vote for a main pager, are the only loopholes to this one and will be pointed out and handled by a moderator.

    8). If a candidate is caught campaigning for CotM, either publicly or privately via PM or social media, they will be disqualified and quite possibly banned. Do your selling through your writing. Begging is lame.

    9). Columns about columns (such as the State of the CF or End of Year CF Awards) are not eligible for COTM consideration and will not be counted in favor of their respective authors in the final tally for the month.

    10). As it pertains to collaborations, there are a few variations that require clarification.
    a) If it's a "tag team" style "traditional" collaboration (i.e.: ETA or The Power Trip or The Mega Column) then both members of the team must vote in order to claim victory as a team.
    b) If a single columnist gathers a group of individuals for a "roundtable" collab, only the organizer of said series must vote in order to claim victory. For instance, if Jimmy McColumnGuyDuderson wants to break down the greatest jobbers of all time and asks two of his pals to help out, only Jimmy needs to vote in order to win the award should he garner enough votes since he is the blatant driving force, as opposed to the give and take equality of a "tag team" collab.
    For the voters, if you wish to specifically vote for a "traditional" collab team, name both writers. If you wish to honor a "roundtable" collab, just name the organizer of said collab.

    11) You cannot vote for a former main page writer until said writer is at least 4 months removed from their main page stint at the time of the voting period. For instance, if Writer McGee just left his main page spot in January and resumed writing in the CF, he is not eligible to win CotM until the May contest. This rule is included simply because it's kind of stupid to award a main page column to a writer who just gave up a gig in which the point was to post columns on the main page. If they wanted to be on the main page then they probably would've, you know, stayed on the main page. We get that the CF has a certain allure, what with the sense of community and ability to win awards from one's peers and all that, but let us not forget the reason why the CF exists in the first place. It's not to placate egos by handing out peer determined awards, it's to find writers for the Lords of Pain main page. If you've had that spot and chose to leave it, perhaps it's time that someone else got the opportunity to prove why they deserve a shot. This rule is only applicable to the COLUMNIST vote, not the single COLUMN vote.

    12). In the event of a tie, regardless the number of people involved, the deadlock be broken by means of a re-vote with the tied parties as the only available candidates. Said re-vote will be three days long. If we still have a tie after that, fuck it, we've got two winners.










    Here are the list of eligible columns.

    BEAR
    -How Dare You

    Benjamin Button
    -Sunday Morning Coming Down 2: Reflecting on AEW’s first World Title Match.
    -The Best Talkers as voted by LOP forums

    DynamiteBillington
    -Fact or Fiction: Forum Edition (et al)

    Kingzak13
    -Clash of the Champions 2019 Predictions

    Mizfan (The Life & Times of Bobby Heenan)
    -The REAL World’s Champion! (Sep ’91)
    -Flair in the Garden, Brain on the Golf Course (Oct ’91)

    LWO4Life
    -How to Lose Fans in 10 Days

    Pennycook Mills
    -Full Production Feedback: Why Seth Rollins Must Lose the Universal Championship to Rey Mysterio

    Prime Time (The Lords of Pain World Heavyweight Championship)
    -2014-2017 (et al)
    -2017-2019 (et al)

    Scottwoodburn
    -Wear sunscreen

    Spinmaster (Mizzie & the Spin’s Total Non-Stop Wrestling Project)
    -A Glimmer of Hope in A Mountain of Turd (w/mizfan)
    -Main Event Massacres (w/mizfan)
    -The Twilight Zone Episode (w/mizfan)






    Don't forget to cast a vote for the Column of the Month gimmick as well. Just name which single column you felt was the best of the month. The actual Column of the Month. Just one. NOT AN ENTIRE SERIES. This will help make the process of voting for Column of the Year when it comes time for the Year End Awards that much easier, as well as give some well deserved props to someone who straight up knocked one out of the park in a given month.


    Voting ends on Tuesday, October 8th at 11:59 PM (CST) / 9:59 PM (PST) / Whatever o'clock :59 (other weird time zones)

    And with that, voting is now open!

  2. #2
    LOP's part time glass ceiling DynamiteBillington's Avatar
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    Wow, slim pickings this month - especially from me! Don't know the stats, but it looks like the quietest month for a good year or so?

    I'll go with Prime Time as columnist for completing the LOPWHC series, and Full Production Feedback: Why Seth Rollins Must Lose the Universal Championship to Rey Mysterio for column.
    FACT or FICTION: Which Promotion Dies? (And can NXT beat Raw/Smackdown?)
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  3. #3
    Mizzie and Spin for columnist(s) of the month

    Mizfan's REAL world champion for column
    See the latest of my Ric Flair saga click here. http://lordsofpain.tv/showthread.php...acock-(Part-2) View my story inspired by colorful wrestlers I've come across in my fandom. http://lordsofpain.tv/showthread.php...-the-Challenge

  4. #4
    Administrator Prime Time's Avatar
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    Pennycook Mills as columnist.

    'How Dare You' for column.

    "The worst moron is the one too stupid to realise they're a moron."

  5. #5
    Member #25 SirSam's Avatar
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    I'm going to go with Prime Time for his work on the LOP HW series

    How BEAR You for column
    SIR SAM'S COURT
    The Night It Was Still Real To Me
    @Sir_Samuel

  6. #6
    The Brain
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    I have to throw a vote towards Benjamin Button here for columnist, with honorable mention for Pete and my man Spin, among others. But if you haven't read his top 5 talkers series, you're missing out!

    For individual there are several good contenders, but I have to go with Pennycook Mills very excellent piece.

  7. #7
    Beautiful Fandom Mystic's Avatar
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    Got to go Ben Button for his Talker series. It got me back here for 2 seconds and showed me some varied opinions across the CF on who can get it done on the microphone.

    Bear for column with the How Dare You. That column was ill. Mentally.

  8. #8
    Do I shit in the woods? BEAR's Avatar
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    Mizzie and Spin for me


    Scotty Woodburn for column

  9. #9
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    Columnist: Scott Woodburn
    Column: Wear Sunscreen by Scott Woodburn

  10. #10
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    Mizzington and Spin for Columnist(s)


    Scott Woodburn's, Wear Sunscreen for Column.


  11. #11
    HUGE Member TheLAW's Avatar
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    Benny B for Columnist

    LWO's How to lose fans in 10 days for column

  12. #12
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    LWO for columnist and for column

  13. #13
    Benjamin Button for columnist

    Scott Woodburn's "Wear Sunscreen" for column

  14. #14
    Senior Member
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    Columnist: Benny
    Column: Bear - How Dare You

  15. #15
    Administrator Prime Time's Avatar
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    Don's vote is late - but it does not really matter because Pennycook Mills got on with about half an hour to spare, and his vote means we don't need a run-off - Benjamin Button wins by a vote, over the duo of Mizfan and Spinmaster.

    It is too late to split the other award though, and Bear and Scott Woodburn's third leg entry in the YLC final tied for and share the individual column award.

    Congratulations all and thanks to everyone for voting and however you've taken part.

    Full Tally:

    Ben: IIII
    Mizfan/Spin: III
    PT: II
    Pennycook: I
    LWO: I

    "The worst moron is the one too stupid to realise they're a moron."

  16. #16
    The Brain
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    Thanks greatly for the votes all, and congrats to Benny for continuing his awesome streak this year! I think the way the votes were so divided really shows you that despite a bit of a low turnout, the high quality stuff was really spread about.

    Congrats to Bear and Scott as well!

  17. #17
    Do I shit in the woods? BEAR's Avatar
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    Benny Boy is on fire!

    Well done buddy, and to Scott

  18. #18
    Beautiful Fandom Mystic's Avatar
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    Lord have mercy, Ben Buttons is doing work this year.

    Agree with mizfan, the outcomes shows quality spread about.

  19. #19
    Congrats to Bear! And Scott keep burning that wood. Really loved Mizzie and Spin this month.

    Thank you all for participating. I've been here since 2009. Matter of fact, my first COTM was September 2009, exactly a decade ago.

    So I don't think I should win more COTMs this year, after this one, because this is a stamping ground for those future MP writers. I like that we old timers can win some, but I dont want to win so many that Im taking from others. I love the CF and hope it continues to be an outlet for all kinds of creativity and community as its been.

    My goal is to give more than I take, so I'm in the process of working on challenging myself in a new way that you will soon see.

    Thanks again!
    Last edited by Benjamin Button; 10-10-2019 at 04:27 AM.
    See the latest of my Ric Flair saga click here. http://lordsofpain.tv/showthread.php...acock-(Part-2) View my story inspired by colorful wrestlers I've come across in my fandom. http://lordsofpain.tv/showthread.php...-the-Challenge

  20. #20
    Member #25 SirSam's Avatar
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    What a dude. This is Benny Button's year!
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    The Night It Was Still Real To Me
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  21. #21
    LOP's part time glass ceiling DynamiteBillington's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Benjamin Button View Post
    C
    So I don't think I should win more COTMs this year, after this one
    Start writing some crap columns then
    FACT or FICTION: Which Promotion Dies? (And can NXT beat Raw/Smackdown?)
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  22. #22
    I've been doing that for 10 years
    See the latest of my Ric Flair saga click here. http://lordsofpain.tv/showthread.php...acock-(Part-2) View my story inspired by colorful wrestlers I've come across in my fandom. http://lordsofpain.tv/showthread.php...-the-Challenge

  23. #23
    The Brain
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    Probably literally at some point! I'll never forget the first Benny column I ever read was something about the Steiners and a penis. "Eye of the Tiger", it was called, and you can guess which "eye" was being referred to in that scenario!

  24. #24
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    Congrats Benny!

    One of my favourite writers of all time on Lords of Pain. And judging from the post above what a humble guy.

    Well deserved dude.

  25. #25
    Quote Originally Posted by mizfan View Post
    Probably literally at some point! I'll never forget the first Benny column I ever read was something about the Steiners and a penis. "Eye of the Tiger", it was called, and you can guess which "eye" was being referred to in that scenario!
    Lol. Man, it was about a man and his tag partner. The partner was revealed to be just that. During it, the narrator recalls taking on the Steiner sisters in a way like he was calling the Stieners girls as an insult, but he actually meant two Jewish sisters with the last name Steiner. His partner abandons him, and they feud, with him beating his partner every night. He takes a Viagra and in the end, he reunites with his old teammate. Then, it's revealed what the eye of the Tiger is all about, brother!

    Quote Originally Posted by Don Franc View Post
    Congrats Benny!

    One of my favourite writers of all time on Lords of Pain. And judging from the post above what a humble guy.

    Well deserved dude.

    Thanks, man! Means a lot coming from you!



    Well, all, I may not have another column in the CF for awhile, as I will be soon joining the Main Page. Unless I sneak one in before my first MP column. But I will be next door and still feed backing here a lot! I will continue my Fragments that Formed Flair every now and then on the MP and probably will do the Bloody Bastards stuff in creative works.

    Thanks, all, for this great year of reading and writing. As the Stinger said, "this is not 'goodbye' but 'See you later!'"
    Last edited by Benjamin Button; 4 Weeks Ago at 08:04 PM.
    See the latest of my Ric Flair saga click here. http://lordsofpain.tv/showthread.php...acock-(Part-2) View my story inspired by colorful wrestlers I've come across in my fandom. http://lordsofpain.tv/showthread.php...-the-Challenge

  26. #26
    Beautiful Fandom Mystic's Avatar
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    Congrats, man. It is well deserved. Go take your turn at the plate.

  27. #27
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    Congrats Ben. Don't let the MP change your writing. Do you.


  28. #28
    The Brain
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    Benny on the MP, now that's really something... congrats, man!

  29. #29
    LOP's part time glass ceiling DynamiteBillington's Avatar
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    I guess it was becoming inevitable - nice one
    FACT or FICTION: Which Promotion Dies? (And can NXT beat Raw/Smackdown?)
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